Get Gooped: A Gwyneth Paltrow Gift Guide

Ridiculous but awesome might be a good place to start when it comes to Gwyneth Paltrow's gift selections via her lifestyle brand goop.

Goop curates the heck out of holiday shopping , both online and through pop-up stores in New York, Miami and Newport Beach, California. Prices go high and low in a range of categories, including gifts for hosts, animal lovers, travelers, "dreamers," lovers and the under-18 crowd.

But it's her over-the-top picks that often generate buzz. This year, that includes a $16,500 at-home float tank from Royal Spa, an antique, hand-carved canoe (with oars!) for $7,995 from Jayson Home and the Personal Yellow Submarine (for yachtspeople who have everything) that goes for, well, price upon request, from Y.Co.

And for the rest of us? Some highlights:

HOUSEWARMING
When the claro walnut timber, mirrored glass and burnished brass barcart for $10,450 is out of reach, there's always the Psychic Vampire Repellent spray-able elixir, a mist that uses a combination of "gem healing" and aromatic oils to "banish bad vibes," $28, from Paper Crane Apothecary.

Flowers arrangers: Goop lists a $72 pair of carbon steel, 24-carat gold-plated snippers (14 centimeters long) from the U.K. scissor makers Ernest Wright & Son. Too steep? Go for the bar of Brooklyn-made coffee mint soap instead, from Saipua, $18.

Got $425 to spare for the best party giver in your life? Gift the White Insieme cheese knives, three in a set, handmade by a single craftsman in the Tuscan countryside. Handles are Lucite, blades are carbon and stainless steel.

THE KIDS
Sadly, the tot-size Christian Louboutin ballet slippers in satin, glitzy gold and silk - and price tag of $250 - have sold out. There's always the gray alpaca beanie-style rabbit hat with long floppy ears for $56, from Oeuf NYC.

Got a teen worth a $1,499 gift? There's a skateboard hybrid with a huge rubber wheel at the center for use on a range of terrains, called the Onewheel.

Owning a chicken coop is one thing. Gifting a chicken coop rental, complete with egg-laying chickens, is quite another. It's called, appropriately enough, Rent the Chicken, and it operates through various providers around the U.S. A five-week rental goes for $174, but prices vary depending on location.

STOCKING STUFFERS
A cool little wooden cube speaker with a built-in amplifier and crafted out of natural-hued beechwood. It offers four to five hours of playback per charge, $50, from Kikkerland.

A bundle of "soothing bath and meditation aids," with aged essential oil, vegan soap, incense blends and a palo santo wood stick, $38, from Incausa. Palo santo, for the record, means "holy wood" in Spanish.

Paltrow likes her charcoal. She offers us:

Kishu binchotan activated sticks from Japan that can be dropped into tap water to remove chemicals, soften water or improve the taste. They can also be added to a hot bath with promises of improved circulation and to detoxify, or placed in a garden to improve soil. A single stick usually lasts three to four months, $16, from Morihata.

The same company offers and goop is selling an $8 binchotan charcoal toothbrush. The bristles are charcoal infused. Says goop: "This brush is amazing for preventing bad breath and thoroughly cleansing teeth and your whole mouth."

And if that isn't enough charcoal choices, pick up a bar of Herbivore Botanicals bamboo charcoal soap for filtering and purifying and detoxifying and deep cleansing and exfoliating, for $12.

If matcha's more like it: goop is selling Four Sigmatic Mushroom Matcha with Lion's Mane, an organic ceremonial-grade tea and extract of the frilly, anemone-like mushroom, to drink as a "stimulating morning ritual," 20 servings, $33.

THE ANIMAL LOVERS
The Meeko Half-Tone Tepee by Max Bone is a $160 cotton canvas tent for your dog.

A $375 device from Petcube will fling treats at your dog or cat. It's also a two-way audio speaker and HD camera with a night vision option, and sound and motion alerts.

The chicest doggy-do baggy carrier one could ever need, from Cloud7. It's a $42 felt pouch with a hook and gold buttons to latch onto a leash.

Also from Cloud7, a tweed travel pet bed in a sturdy hemp-cotton mix that folds up with Velcro straps and a carry strap and folds out into a fuzzy sheep's wool blend mat, $100.

THE DREAMERS
Who doesn't have a few? Sometimes it's more about the idea than the gift.

Moon Juice Brain Dust, $38. It's "an enlightening edible formula alchemized to align you with the mighty cosmic flow needed for great achievement," says goop. It recommends adding one teaspoon of the herbal supplement to 8 ounces of any hot or cold liquid, good for 25 servings. What's in it? Organic astragalus, shilajit, maca, lion's mane, rhodiola, ginkgo and stevia.

For the gift recipient near, in or willing to travel to Landers, California: There's a structure there called The Integration described by its operators as a "resonant tabernacle and energy machine sited on a powerful geomagnetic vortex in the magical Mojave Desert." More specifically, the late George Van Tassel claimed the structure is based on the design of Moses' Tabernacle, the writings of Nikola Tesla and telepathic directions from extraterrestrials. By the numbers, it's a dome room that is 38 feet high and 55 feet in diameter made of wood and designed for the purpose of rejuvenation and time travel, according to its website.

For $250 and one to four guests, lucky giftees can take a "sound bath" there. It involves lounging on cozy padded mats, so there's that.